Author Archives: maggiejay64

About maggiejay64

I am a 51 year old woman, who lives in NY state. I received my MSW in May 2013. I have worked with people with developmental disabilities for most of my life. I love working with this population and have learned countless lessons from the people with whom I have been privileged to work. In Jan 2014 I received my LMSW and am currently working at a counselor in a Outpatient substance abuse facility. One of my greatest challenges in life is the fact that I lived through incest and the hell that followed. It took forty some years but today I can say I have come out on the other side..... mostly intact.

Vacation

Vacation implies a sense of freedom from the every day..People look forward to it all year The difference for me is what?    ………….That’s right PTSD PTSD means I don’t always feel safe in my own home with people who … Continue reading

Posted in c-ptsd, childhood trauma, complex ptsd, healing from childhood sexual abuse, incest, mental health, mental illness, ptsd, Uncategorized | Tagged , , , | 1 Comment

The curse of facebook and PTSD!

I have been working at living a life where I manage my PTSD well. That is code for I try not to let it  interrupt everything do. It has only been a couple of years that I have been convinced … Continue reading

Posted in c-ptsd, complex ptsd, family, healing from childhood sexual abuse, incest, mental health, mental illness, ptsd, self harm, sexual abuse, trust, Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 4 Comments

I notice little things….

Changes make me feel unsafe in the world no matter what. I tried to think of another ending for that sentence but the truth is big changes or  little changes make me feel unsafe in the world. I recently changed … Continue reading

Posted in c-ptsd, childhood trauma, complex ptsd, healing from childhood sexual abuse, incest, mental health, mental illness, ptsd, sexual abuse, Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

I Hate PTSD!

It has been a year, maybe more, since I have written. I have forgotten how therapeutic  it can be. I also forget that there are many on the same path with me. Sometimes fighting this fight can be the loneliest … Continue reading

Posted in c-ptsd, childhood trauma, complex ptsd, healing from childhood sexual abuse, incest, mental health, mental illness, ptsd, sexual abuse, Uncategorized | Tagged , , , | 5 Comments

My logic is hidden in fear today!

For the last week and a half I have been dealing with a “bad bout” of my PTSD. Most times I can use logic and reason and remember that I will be okay. A bad bout is different. In a … Continue reading

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Scared…….again

Soooooooo…….last week I felt like I had everything together! Then this week one of my clients felt as though he could hug me….no invitation, no permission given, but he hugged me. My head buzzed with words…no, please back up, boundaries … Continue reading

Posted in c-ptsd, childhood trauma, complex ptsd, healing from childhood sexual abuse, incest, mental health, mental illness, ptsd, sexual abuse, Uncategorized | Leave a comment

As i turn 52 years old today ! I think back at where i came from and where i am today. Never in a million years would I have expected to be in a happy and healthy relationship. I could not have told … Continue reading

Posted in c-ptsd, childhood trauma, incest, mental health, mental illness, trust, Uncategorized | Tagged , , , | 1 Comment